|Chip Martin aka The Colonel|
|Allies||Miles Halter, Alaska Young|
|Appearances||Looking for Alaska|
Chip is poor so he likes to make fun of the Weekday Warriors, aka the rich kids who go home on the weekends. He loves to prank his fellow classmates- but he makes a point to never, ever be a rat.
The Colonel is a funny guy, but he is very blunt. He admits to Miles Halter instantly that he is not well liked at the school. The first night at school, the Weekday Warriors pee in The Colonel's shoes, and almost killed Miles by throwing him in the water with duck tape on his mouth.
The Colonel is a big smoker and pushes Miles to buy cigarettes for him. Soon, The Colonel and Miles become good friends. The Colonel invites Miles to join in on their pranks and emphasizes constantly that if anyone is caught to take the fall and not rat out the others.
Chip has a good relationship with his mom, Dolores, trusts and supports him. She is an amazing cook and works at their local waffle house. She lives in a trailer park. Chip goes home on all holidays to spend time with her. Meanwhile, Chip does not stand his father. His father leaves while he was at Culver Creek.
The Colonel was dating a Weekday Warrior named Sara for a while. He lost his virginity to her. Alaska set them up, but they fought constantly and eventually, she broke up with him. He decided it was a good thing because deep down he couldn't stand her.